I Wunder if Anyone Knows what “Unique” Means Anymore

Brach’s Wunder Beans Jelly Beans

The packaging claims “Jelly Beans in 24 Unique Flavors” – and now they’re claiming 25 instead. Whichever the count, I’m not so certain that blue berry, cinnamon, grape, lemon… etc. can be considered “unique” flavors today, or even a generation ago for that matter. Interestingly enough, the 25-flavor variety includes such flavors as “wild blueberry,” “hot cinnamon,” “grape lightening [sic]” and “lemonade”; which I rather suspect are simply the more common flavors renamed. Whatever you think of marketing language and the word “unique,” through, the simple truth is that Brach’s Wunder Beans aren’t truly “wunderful.”

I say that because although they emulate the small size of higher-end gourmet beans and incorporate some more esoteric flavors, Brach’s beans are still heavily flavored candy shells around a neutral-flavored whitish gel center. That differs from true gourmet beans, in which the flavor goes all the way through. Sigh.

Jelly Beans from the People Who Bring You the J for Your PB&J

Welch’s Jelly Beans

With a nickname like “The Jelly Bean Fiend,” you can bet I’m always on the lookout for a different brand or flavor of my favorite candy, so when I happened on a bag from the folks at Welch’s recently I took the plunge. The 8-ounce bag of Welch's Jelly Beans set me back a whoppin’ $1.99 at my neighborhood Walgreens – I was there in search of Brach’s pectin beans, but no luck – so I was pretty sure they weren’t “gourmet.” I was right. Unlike the super-cheap beans from WalMart and similar brands, these aren’t made in Mexico: they’re made in Brazil, and distributed by the Frankford Candy Company of Philadelphia.

This Must be what Happens When You Dehydrate Gatorade

Jelly Belly Sport Beans

When it comes to jelly beans, I love the little guys: I can only resist licorice and the snot- and earwax-flavored ones in the gross “BeanBoozled” collections. That means a packet of Jelly Belly Sport Beans is right up my alley, especially since I'm often looking for fortification and replenishment during exercise time.